Monday

. . . googling all the people I have done wrong . . .

Tuesday

. . . when you give somebody the finger, and they wave at you, because they first thought you were waving at them, but then they look closer and realize you are giving them the finger, so they retract their waving hand as though it had just gotten burnt, and they look at you in a confused kind of way. You know?

Saturday

When I was young, I only had one invisible, imaginary friend. Pretty pathetic. I couldn't even imagine a decent social life back when my imagination was at its strongest.

Thursday

This is what I'm talking about: Borf
I've seen Borf all over DC. I see Borf on my metro ride to work every day.