I haven’t owned a car in five years, so, this car I just bought, I’m driving it all over the place. I drive to little beach towns and go swimming, and then I find the town’s little library and stand there in the reference section - seeing what they have: maps, local interest, local history, newspapers and so on. I stand there in my flip flops, a little ocean water still dripping off me. The librarians in these small beach town libraries don’t seem to mind if you're a little wet. Just don't drip on the books. I hang around a little while, but I’m eager to get back to driving.

A long, straight road is meditative - a road that drops off the horizon before it bends left or right. Heat from the road bends the light before it reaches my eyes, and the whole scene ahead looks wavy. Sometimes in the early afternoon or late morning, there are barely any cars ahead or behind. Then I’ll see a single car crossing the road way way far ahead. It’s like looking into the future. I’ll be there soon. It gets hypnotic - I get enthralled with the wavering scene so far ahead - I start to think I am already there.

I also drive through strip mall parking lots because that’s what the world has become, that’s what’s here. I drive slowly past the shop entrances and people walk in front of my car slowly. I look in each store as I pass - there are stories in each one. I drive around behind the strip mall. Workers take the trash out and smoke back there. There are homeless camps. Empty food cans, clothes, busted up chairs and bikes and carts. Dishwashers from the restaurants smoke weed back by the dumpsters. They look at me and wonder what I’m doing back there. I don’t know.

Yesterday I drove through some office parks, scoping out some work prospects, going at it a weird way. Instead of browsing Monster or the local paper, I just go to where the work is - the office parks. More people standing outside to smoke. Some people are out for a bit of exercise, a brisk walk with coworkers in their sneakers.

This essay is getting a little ridiculous now, and I’m going to go . . . My brain’s getting soft. Was it ever hard? This is my world lately, though. Just spacing out.


Anonymous said...

Very pretty site! Keep working. thnx!

r's musings said...

I like this dreamy post! Reminds me of how free I felt when I first learned to drive. My first car...a silver blue Mazda GLC, four-door hatchback. Not the best-looking car, but it had wheels and it would move!